Love, With A Hook

Last night, while listening to an audio presentation about God's love, this comment made me grab a pen and start writing, "We want what He gives, but don't want to give what he gave us." Wow!

All of  a sudden my mind was working at warp speed, and that is fast.

He loves me unconditionally. I want that kind of love, but do I love others that way? Can I look into the eyes of a woman sitting on the sidewalk and greet her with a smile? Not usually. I either look the other way or cross the street. Can I sit beside a smelly woman on the bus and talk with her? I'd rather not answer that question. Can I drive by a panhandler without judging or questioning his lifestyle? Sometimes, but not often.

I'm not talking about giving them money. I'm talking about seeing them as Christ sees them. Do we see them as people who need unconditional love and acceptance? Do we even see them at all, really see them?

I thinks Christ weeps over them just as he did over Jerusalem. He weeps for their loneliness and pain, their hopelessness and lost-ness. (that's not a word, but I'm using it anyway) Some are lost sheep without a shepherd. Still others know the shepherd's voice but have either wandered away or are waiting for his help to arrive.

That's why I think Jesus cries even more for us, we aren't arriving. We have chosen not to see those who suffer; therefore, we are not loving, we are not helping, we not not ministering.  

For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’

They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’

He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’  Matthew 25:31-46

For some reason, we tend to add an egocentric, barbed hook to the end of  "I'll do it for the least of these" We add a but, an if only,or a when you. We do it without thinking. We do it to the guy on the corner and the gal in the doorway.

"If he/she got cleaned up a little and showed up in church, then I might see what I could do."

"I'd be willing to buy him a sandwich, but I'm not getting close to him now. When he doesn't reek like whiskey anymore, I'll consider helping him"

"As I always say, God helps those who help themselves."

Sadly, we do the same with family members. It might not be as overt as the following conversation I overheard at the mall one day, but the "I love you" hook can be there.

"You always buy Suzy things and not me. Why do you love her more?"

"I don't. I love you both the same. You know that."

"Then why don't I get earrings too?"

"Because today I decided to buy your sister some, not you. (long pause while mother thinks) Okay, to prove that I love you I will buy whatever earrings you want when you take off five pounds. Deal?"

I could understand the earring situation if it were a reward for grades or a promise kept. But in this scenario the older, slender sister gets earrings because mom decides so. Little sister gets earrings if she loses weight. That is how she will know her mom loves her. This was not unconditional love. This was love with Mom's hook in it.  I wanted to cry.

To be perfectly honest, I have no idea what God's unconditional love is like. There is no way I can wrap my finite mind around that concept. That is part of my problem: I tend to see unconditional love as a concept. It isn't a concept. It is reality. I understand it intellectually and conceptually--God loves me no matter what I do or don't do. He loves me because he loves me. I have even experienced that love microscopically through answered prayers, prophetic words, and soul rattling corporate prayer. But to be overwhelmed by the power of his love, to be swept off my feet is my desire.

How can I even begin loving the unloved, disenfranchised people in my community unconditionally, if I have not let myself experience that kind of love. How can I pray for spiritual revival and the ouster of the enemy camp in my community if I don't see its people, feel them, smell them, or cry for them as my Lord does?

I must press closer to the Lord. I must listen to his heart, and learn to love as he loves. My pride must go. Maybe then I can give to others what he has given me, unconditional love. But for now, God knows my heart and its desires for my community, church and family. Although my love still tends to be conditional, I will continue to pray to the best of my ability knowing God will answer as he wills.

And what about forgiveness? He has given that to me too. Can I also give it away? That is another topic for another day.

I'm off to bed with my mind full of more questions than answers.

Jan, Licorice Kitty and family

(I am very happy with the little ones today. I had to clean their litter box.)